Fantastic Four #307

Fantastic Four #307- “Good-bye”
Cover Date/ Price: Oct 1987 $.75
Writer/ Artist- Steve Englehart/ John Buscema/ Joe Sinnott
Cover Tagline: “To Duel With Diablo”
Number of issues between last box pull: 10

What Happened: This fine looking issue starts with a trio of terrifically dressed travelers: Reed Richards, Sue Richards, and Franklin Richards as they get ready to depart from their lives as superheroes. It seems in the issues since I last read from “the box,” Reed and Sue have decided that it would be in the best interests of their young son to move to Connecticut and live a “normal” life.

As the Richards’ spend a few pages saying their goodbyes, we see that the Fantastic Four will continue on with some slight changes in membership. The new lineup will consist of Ben Grimm as the team leader, the Human Torch, the element controlling Inhuman known as Crystal, and the female powerhouse known as Ms. Marvel.


An unexpected lineup for sure, but it brings to mind a question: Which of these characters is the genius-level intellect that serves as a good replacement for Reed? The last time I checked, Crystal wasn’t very close to making her own ultimate nullifier…

Reed tells the Thing that he has earned the right to command the team, and Ben makes the former Mr. Fantastic promise that he won’t come back to save the day the first time the new team falters.

Meanwhile, Johnny flies off to go see his WIFE (I didn’t review that one, apparently…) Alicia Masters, and the two have a scintillating discussion about when the furniture for their apartment will arrive. I only mention it because it has some relevance later.

We cut to a scene at the hospital, where the super villain known as Diablo lies in head-to-toe bandages after being beaten in a near coma by Ms. Marvel last issue. While the doctors talk about the villains wounds, his thoughts reveal that he’s got another trick up his sleeve, well, actually another trick up his moustache.

Apparently Diablo keeps his magic potions all over his body, and he sucks on his moustache to give him a real pick-me-up (I don’t write em folks, I just read em…). The revived Diablo gives us a little history lesson about his life, and it turns out he is the master of Alchemy from a time long past. After he reminisces, he stands and swears revenge on Ms. Marvel…

We cut back to Johnny and Alicia’s love-nest, where the young man is startled by a loud crashing sound. It seems that an audio speaker has fallen into a glass table. Alicia feels embarrassed for breaking it, and swears the table wasn’t there a second ago (I guess her “radar sense” from issue #296 wore off). As Johnny uses his power to weld the glass back together, a purple monster emerges from the table! It turns out the table was possessed. Apparently the whole city is sharing this same wackiness, as the ground outside starts breaking apart and growing tentacles. Johnny decides this is a job for the Fantastic Four and rushes Alicia to safety at FF Plaza…

The new FF groups together, and Crystal realizes that the whole city transmuting could only be the work of the Diablo. As the team surveys the changes taking form, they see that the hospital where Diablo was staying has now taken the form of an old timey castle. As Ben and Ms. Marvel (who goes by the name Sharon Ventura at this point in comic continuity) attack the front door, Johnny and Crystal fly ahead to scout out what’s going on. While the Thing fights alongside the super strong Ms. Marvel, his thoughts reveal that an ongoing attraction for the red clad hottie. Distracted by her raucous attitude and taut bod, the Thing gets blindsided by one of Diablo’s monsters. Let this be a lesson, if you want to keep your head in the game, always hire an uggo to join your superteam instead of a stone cold fox…

We find Johnny and Crystal having similar luck, as the two former lovers argue with one another as they fight Diablo’s machinations inside the castle. Crystal is edgy because she is undergoing a rough patch in her own marriage, and Johnny is worried that she wants to impose upon his recent marriage to Alicia Masters. The two yell at each other some more, and Crystal runs off to face Diablo alone. Just then, Ben and Sharon break in, and the team joins up to face Diablo together.

The FF corner Diablo, and just as he is about to pull another potion from his moustache (So. Incredibly. Lame), Ms. Marvel grabs him and foils his dastardly plan. The big D gives up, and much like the ending to an episode of Scooby-Doo, he is quickly carted away by the authorities. If it wasn’t for those meddling superheroes….

We end the issue with the team chillaxin at FF Plaza (because that’s what people do there!), noting that they once they actually worked together like a team, Diablo didn’t stand a chance. You think most of these characters would have learned that lesson about 300 issues ago, but I guess it’s always nice for a refresher….

What I Thought: I honestly NEVER knew about this incarnation of the team, and that made it a total blast to read this issue. Although a lot of time is spent with Reed and Sue saying goodbye, there is an actually feeling that they’re leaving the team for a while. Of course, any real comics fan knows that a team member’s departure is going to be short lived, but it always livens things up to bring in some new blood for a while.

I will say that in reality, a person probably wouldn’t assemble a team of exes to serve alongside them in their superheroic purposes. While it lends itself to drama for the readers, I’m just a little unsure that a group like this would work out. It’s almost too much of a forced soap opera spin, but at least in this instance I was kind of hooked.

Overall, this issue felt like a really entertaining Saturday morning cartoon. There are some interesting little character interactions, we get the villain’s backstory in a quickie flashback (which is great because I didn’t know anything about Diablo), and the “fight” is wrapped up in a neat little package. There’s even the whole “lesson” type epilogue, a la “Saved by the Bell.”

I haven’t looked ahead to see which issue is next from “the box,” but I hope it still features this team. While I don’t think I’ll ever stomach an FF team that features a full time aberration of the original lineup, I always like to see the rise and fall of these substitute teams. So until Diablo decides to shave off his moustache, vive le fantastique!

Hello Nurse!

Fantastic Four #296

Fantastic Four 296-“Homecoming”
Nov 1986 $1.50 (Dang! For 1986, it better be worth it!)
Writer/ Artist- Jim Shooter/ Stan Lee/ Barry Windsor-Smith/Kerry Gammill/ Ron Frenz/ Al Milgrom/ John Buscema/ Marc Silvestri / Jerry Ordway
Cover Tagline: “The World’s Greatest Comic Magazine”
Number of issues since last box pull: 5

(Editor’s Note- Today’s review will continue the trend of chronicling my journey through a box of 163 Fantastic Four comics. Unlike the “staying current” or “Thinking outside the box” posts, this comic was included in my original set purchased from eBay. The box is not one complete run, in fact there are some large gaps between issues. But part of the fun of randomly skipping through continuity is seeing just how much the FF has changed over the years!)

What happened: This 25th anniversary issue opens with Benjamin Grimm doing his best “Ninja Turtles Disguise” impression and walking around in the pouring rain in the city of Stockton.As the gargantuan figures stalks the night like some kind of emo version of Andre the Giant, a car accidentally runs into him due to the low visibility. The driver checks on Ben to see if he’s okay, and the Thing tells the driver to scram. Once again, nobody writes The Thing like Stan Lee:

Anyway, we find out that the Thing is back in Stockton because that’s where the FF’s ship originally crash landed after it was hit with cosmic rays. If you’ve never seen the FF’s origin, than this is a comic for you (and you probably haven’t been paying attention to superhero culture anytime in the past 60 years).

After he finishes reminiscing, Ben bemoans his fate as the monstrous Thing, and decides that his best course of action is to flee humanity and go live on Monster Island. Accordingly, he has his pilot buddy drop him off in the middle of the ocean, and he makes his way ashore.

We cut to the sunny setting of Los Angeles California, where Reed Richards, Sue Storm, and Johnny Storm are hot on Ben’s trail (after scanning for his brain waves!), trying to find out what happened to him. The “tremendous three” ambush the pilot that dropped Ben in the middle of the sea, and we find out the man’s name is Hopper Hertnecky. Old Hopper tells Reed and co. that they’ve never really cared about Ben, and that the Thing finally decided that he couldn’t live among men anymore. Man, that pilot sure doesn’t mince words…

Skipping over the b-story of the issue, Reed decides that if Ben wants to live with monsters, that’s fine. He just wants to have one last “man-to-man” talk with his friend, and then he can let go of the guilt of not being able to cure the Thing of his rocky form. Reed, Sue, and Johnny get ready for adventure, all while telling the very dismayed She-Hulk and Alicia Masters to sit this one out.

The F3 make it to Monster Island and land the Fantasti-Car by the mouth of the cave. As they get out they are ambushed by (you guessed it!) monsters. The Fantasti-Car is literally smashed to bits by a giant creature and the F3 escape into the cave. I guess they’ll be staying at Monster Island for a while too!

The 3 continue to fight monsters until they are overwhelmed within the bowels of the island. Their only saving grace….Ben Grimm, dressed like an unholy hybrid the Mole Man and 80’s pop icon Prince!

“Purple Rain Thing” explains that the Mole Man and he are now best friends, and that he serves as a security officer of sorts for Monster Island. The Mole Man, acting very much like a jealous lover, is distrusting of the appearance of the 3, and tells the Thing not to trust his former teammates. The Mole Man then leaves to go get some “treatments” and Ben shows the F3 around the island. After showing them the Koi pond and Jamba Juice kiosk, Ben reveals the grand finale: the Mole Man’s burrowing machine!

If you didn’t know where this comic was going before, you should now…

Anyway, Mole Man finds out about the “unauthorized” tour Ben gave the F3, and once again throws a “jealous girlfriend” sized hissy. Thankfully the MM’s whining is interrupted by some guards who have captured a spy. The spy turns out to be none other than Alicia Masters. If you’re not laughing right now, you should be.

Apparently everyone’s favorite surly pilot Hopper dropped off Alicia so she could “explore” the island. I mean, what kind of man wouldn’t say no to dropping a blind chick off on an island full of monsters? Alicia is injured (probably from monster bites, running into walls, and falling into chasms), so the MM sets her up in sick bay.

In a scene that should quall some of the recent debate here at FF Plaza, Alicia and Ben finally talk about the fact that she’s shacking up with Johnny. While I’m a big fan of “Team Benlicia”, (which sounds way more family friendly than "Team AlJohnny") Ms. Masters herself tells the Thing that he is too self-loathing for her, and that Johnny makes her feel special. Although Alicia might be a Skrull at this point in continuity, we’ll count this as a possible rational for her getting it on with her “lil Stormy boy.”

Cutting to the chase, Reed discovers the Mole Man’s burrowing machine is going to shift the tectonic plates, cause a giant weather related catastrophe, and kill lots of people. The Mole creatures attack the F3, and in one of the best scenes ever, turn Johnny into a complete uggo:

The F3 try and leave the island, and the Thing goes to find the Mole Man for some answers. When Ben finds MM, he sees that his “treatments” have been trips to a holographic dream world full of tall martinis and sexy dames. This leaves the Thing to question the Mole Man’s true loyalties.

The Thing decides that the MM ain’t all he cracked up to be, and goes back to help the F3. The reunited Fantastic Four destroy the drill, repel the monsters, and reverse Johnny’s mutation. The story ends with the team, along with Alicia and Hopper, adrift in the middle of the sea.


What I Thought: This comic was a really mixed bag. The fact that it was ANOTHER oversized issue made for quite a harrowing experience to read through at times. Seeing the FF’s origin rehashed over and over again is starting to grate on this reviewer, but it will be forgiven this time around due to the comic’s purpose as a milestone marker.

I think the weakest part of this issue overall was the plotting by Jim Shooter. The story was pretty standard, and though it was kind of shocking to see the FF get truly snippy with the Thing, it was pretty clear how it would all turn out. And while the whole part with Johnny getting disfigured was shoehorned into a cool moment of realization for the thing, I for one wish he could have stayed a monster for a while longer.

And then there’s the whole idea of Alicia sneaking onto the island to try and find Ben. It was just hilariously idiotic, and yes, that’s coming from a grown man talking about a comic book. Seriously, with her superior exploration skills, maybe Alicia Masters could take over for the blind hero Daredevil if he ever quits (that’s a photoshopped picture waiting to happen).

As you can see from the info at the beginning of the review, there were quite a few artists brought in for this issue. With some of the biggest names in comics at the time (and all of whom could now be considered “ modern legends”), the art is the high point of this issue. Even though each artist has his own undeniable style, the transitions between pages are never jarring, and a smooth look is maintained throughout the book. The complete absence of advertisements (hence the outrageous price) helps to maintain the integrity of the art as well.

And finally, it comes as no surprise that a majority of this issue focuses on the ever-lovin blue eyed Thing. We finally get some kind of resolution to the Ben/Alicia/Johnny drama, and the seeds for She-Hulk exiting so the Thing can come back to the team are sown. This issue also marks the point in my “box” adventures that I’ve moved beyond the John Byrne material, as he had gone to DC at this time to work on the relaunch of Superman. I for one will miss Byrne’s issues, and recommend his run to anyone who has an interest in the FF.

So until Johnny becomes the ugly one on the team, vive le fantastique!

That makes two of us, Ben.

One-Shot Showdown! Stan Lee Edition

It’s One-Shot Showdown! In which I compare the merits of two Fantastic Four related one-shots and render a verdict as to which one’s better. All decisions are final, written in stone, and utterly absolute…something around here has to be, right?

Today's Theme: Stan Lee+ Iconic Marvel Artist= $5 one-shot?

Today's Contenders-

2007's Last Fantastic Four Story

vs.
2008's Fantastic Four: The Lost Adventure


Greetings True Believers! Today's match up has some truly excellent potential for comparative points to ponder. Both of the specials featured in this titanic tussle were penned by none other than the Fantastic Four's very own co-creator, Mr. Stan "the man" Lee! What's even more exciting is that the artists on these issues are both seminal masters in the mighty Marvel manner. Excelsior!!*

*(For those of you that don't speak Stan Lee's native tongue of "Stanish", that means both of these comics were written by Lee, and illustrated by artists who are synonymous with drawing Marvel heroes.) Without further ado... Fight!

The Last Fantastic Four Story

The Plot: "The Universal Tribunal", a collection of minds that communicate through thought alone, decide that Earth serves no purpose and decides to destroy it once and for all. The Tribunal sends its envoy, the indestructible behemoth known as the Adjudicator, to pronounce that the human race has one week left to live.

The entire Marvel race attacks the Adjudicator to no avail, and finally Reed Richards hatches a plot. He sends the Silver Surfer to find a race of unthinking creatures that could defeat the Tribunal. These Decimators attack the Tribunal, and then the Marvel heroes go and save the Tribunal from the Decimators. HUH??

Positives: + This story draws you in with an interesting premise: "What would Marvel heroes do if they knew they only had a week to live?" Lee BRIEFLY explores the relationship of Ben and Alicia, as well as Johnny coming to grips with the fact that his playboy lifestyle will leave him cold and lonely. And I had to laugh because there is no mention of Valeria whatsoever here.



+ John Romita JR. pencils this issue and is brilliantly inked by Scott Hanna and colored by Morry Hollowell. This is one comic where I actually noticed the colors, which are usually lost on me.

Negatives: - While the premise intrigues, the plot fails to deliver. This story reads like the Second Coming of Galactus, except this time he's invincible.

And watching every single Marvel hero try their power on the Adjudicator gets pointless after a few pages. It's like they think he's the sword in the stone, and each hero believes he/she is King Arthur. Look, if Dr. Strange couldn't beat the thing by the hoary hosts of Hogwarts (or whatever), I doubt Ben Grimm's fists could do anything.

-The price/ format seem a little puffed up. It's a prestige format $5 one-shot. Granted John Romita JR. is great, but a lot of the material seems like filler.

- The whole plot of Reed unleashing the Decimators on the race that condemned Earth seems out of character to begin with, and then to have the heroes save the day by saving the very race they endangered just boggles the mind.

Fantastic Four: The Lost Adventure

The Plot: OK, promise you'll stick with me for a second. Stan Lee and Jack Kirby created the Fantastic Four, and worked on the book for 102 consecutive issues(as well as 6 annuals!). That's a lot. They had material for issue 103, but Jack Kirby quit Marvel. Marvel took some of the stuff from this 103rd issue and eventually put it into Fantastic Four #108, in a hodge podge of cut and paste storytelling. What "The Lost Adventure" does is takes Kirby's old pages and notes, and with the help of some current artists, issue 103 is presented in a form closer to what it was supposed to be.

In the issue, Reed Richards recounts a tale of how the team fought a man named Janus, who also goes by the name "Mega-Man." Insert Dr. Light or Zero jokes here. Anyway, Mega-Man has a power vest that has virtually unlimited capabilities, and he uses it to rob a bank. In the bank, Ben Grimm and Johnny Storm just happen to be making a deposit. Mega-Man wipes the floor with them and Johnny gets knocked out. Later, Reed figures that Janus is the Mega-Man, and when he goes to visit the guy at home in Kansas, he's surprised to see that his legs are all busted up. So he has Sue go and hide a spy camera in the guy's house, and they decide to watch him. In the end they figure out that Janus is two brothers, one handicapped version and one evil. Reed uses the Mega-Man's power to fix the guy's busted leg, and then condemns both Januses. One for being evil, and the busted legged one for not telling anyone about the evil guy.

Positives: + It's Jack Kirby on art. They didn't call him "King" for nothing.

+ The issue has the new version of issue 103, Jack's original pages, and a reprint of issue #108. You can see the way everything got all screwed up with the issue after Jack Kirby quit Marvel. It's the one time I've ever seen a relevant reprint that wasn't just filler!

Here's a page from the new version of 103-

Here's Kirby's original work for the sane page (notice the missing panel that Ron Frenz filled in above)-

Here's How Marvel originally used the same page, by cutting it up for Fantastic Four #108-

+ Stan Lee can write the Thing like no one else. I laughed out loud while reading some of his dialogue.
Negatives: - Thanks to this comic being a recreation of a deceased man's half erased notes, this plot gets jumbled. I know the creative team handled it with care, but the issue was still pretty convoluted.

-Stan writes some new things like "D.S.L. line" into this comic, making it feel a lot less representative of the time period it supposedly hearkens back to.

-Overall, I think this unpublished comic wasn't finished enough to warrant this type of presentation.

Winner: While I would not endorse either of these as possible purchases for readers out there, I can safely say that The Last Fantastic Four story is the winner here. With an interesting premise, a more current flavor, and some wonderfully illustrated images, "Last" at the very least held my attention until the end. While I would never disparage the "King", I wish Marvel would have respected him and fans a little more by leaving that particular adventure "lost."

So until Stan Lee and I team up on a comic, Excelsior and Vive le Fantastique!

Fantastic Four #222

Fantastic Four#222- The Possession of Franklin Richards!

Cover Date: Sept. 1980 Price $.50

Writer: Doug Monech Artists: Bill Sienkiewicz and Joe Sinnott

Story: This issue opens with Reed inviting his young son Franklin to go to the library. Franklin says no thanks, and that he'd rather stay at the Baxter Building and play games with his mom, the Invisible Woman. The Thing enters and tells the gang that since Johnny is gone for the day, he is going to catch a movie. The stage is set, and everybody's got something to do, and it's all so productive.

Meanwhile, in quite a change of scenery, a demon named Nicholas Scratch is trapped in a dark dimension. Banished there by his mother Agatha Harkness, Scratch is pulled to a place where he feels energy escaping the dark place. He finds a small rift in the dark place that is connected to the Earth. The only catch? The rift is connected to the Earth through the Negative Zone, which is another dimension that the Fantastic Four discovered. They have the doorway to the Negative Zone in their house, can you all see where this is going?

Sue and Franklin are playing hide and seek in the Baxter Building, and Sue is actually setting a really bad example by cheating. She turns herself invisible and follows her son around, just to watch him and think.Sue reflects on the fact that because of her and Reed's irradiated blood, their son manifests powers in times of stress. That's why his babysitter, Agatha Harkness, has been taking care of him away from the Baxter building. As Franklin is looking for his cheater of a mother (I should get over that, but it's an official abuse of her fantastic powers....but I guess if I could turn invisible I would do a lot worse), he looks in the room with the Negative Zone portal, and is possessed by Scratch's mental powers, which are coming through the above mentioned rift.

Sue flips out and shoots the Fantastic Four flare (the FF's answer to a bat signal) out the window, and Reed, Ben, and Johnny all rush back to the scene. This was before cell phones and teleporters, so Ben takes a cab, Johnny flies away from his race car (subsequently forfeiting his race), and Reed creatively catches a ride with a news helicopter.

The team assembles and finds Frankie there possessed and destroying stuff. Reed sends Johnny to get Dr. Strange, and so he flies to the Doc's house. The Doc is out, but his assistant Wong is home and asks if he can help. Johnny brushes off Wong and readers everywhere are forced to have pity on the assistant for a number of reasons. Johnny comes back and tells Reed the Doctor's out, and they realize they can just take Frankie to see Agatha, because she's a witch and she can deal with crazy situations like this.

They take Frankie to see Agatha, and they all decide to have a seance (!!!????) to figure out the problem. A dude named Gabriel intervenes, having found out about the situation from an informant that was watching Dr. Strange's house. Gabriel recognizes the Demon, and Scratch identifies himself in a moment straight out of the Exorcist. The issue ends with Scratch telling the FF they can only get their son back if they take the body to the town of New Salem, so Scratch can escape. He has the team right where he wants them, because only he can re open the portal to the Negative Zone and free Frankie.

Thoughts: This story had everything going for it, until the seance part. Stuff like that creeps me out in comics. It's just not a very heroic course of action, in my opinion. I'd like to think the FF could do better than that. But overall, this story is tightly paced, and although many of the things that happen to move the story forward (such as Ben walking out on the movie early cause it was so bad just as the Fantastic Flare was in the air) were convenient, they were at least logical. The art in this book was really well done. Sienkiewicz and Sinnott are modern day legends of the comic book industry, so no surprise there.